Thursday, August 30, 2012

Little Rays of Sunshine In the Storm

It seems Ethan's story is causing quite a storm.  In one way, this is heart-warming to us, as the love and support that has been expressed to us during this difficult time, has carried us through.  The prayers that have been lifted up have made a huge difference in our lives and we will be forever grateful to our brothers and sisters in Christ for calling on God to help our family. 

On the other hand, the storm is causing distress for GW.  We would like to respectfully ask that people channel their anger, support, and efforts into something positive.  The last thing we want is for Ethan's adoption to be compromised because of negative press.  There is a time and a place to stand up for what is right and we kindly ask that people think of positive ways to help make this situation better. 

As a family, we are praying for God's will to be done.  He has allowed this crisis for a reason and we strongly feel that part of that is so we can have a better understanding for other adoptive families.  Our Adoption Ministry is so important to us and we want to have all the tools and resources we can to help others.  We now have advice about what to do when something terrible happens.  Even when it is hard we are called to rejoice in times of trouble.  I am so thankful that God has been by our side the entire time and even more comforting, that He is with Ethan at all times. 

We are praying without ceasing for Ethan and hoping we will get a call very soon that he is ready to come home. He has been moved to a hospital in Nanjing for another heart surgery. I was thankful to know that he is alive and that they are taking care of him. My heart hurts so badly that he doesn't have his mommy and daddy to love on him while he is hurting and recovering. We picture angels surrounding his hospital room, guiding the doctors and nurses. We hope he feels loved and protected.

One thing that has been on our hearts is that maybe God is leading us to our baby Reese sooner than we thought.  Even though we have been waiting for many years (our paperwork was logged in March 8, 2007), we knew the wait was going to stretch out for several more.  Our DTC FB group has many families that are adopting two special needs children at one time and we have discussed several times how we should have pulled our dossier out of line and found our baby girl at the same time as our son.  These thoughts came when it was too late to do that.  Now we feel strongly that it is time to find Reese with the hopes of Ethan recovering and being able to travel to adopt them both at one time.  This will complete the Tucker family and give us the rest of our lives to help other people adopt!  I know we have a lot of prayer warriors out there and we want to ask for your prayers for us as we pursue our 6th and final child.  It may seem crazy, but nothing about our life right now is "normal"! 

Honestly, we are ready to complete our family.  The stress of adopting takes a lot of time, money, energy, patience, and perseverance. It is time for us to complete what we have started and move on to being a support for other families. God has given us the desire to bring Reese home and we believe He will help us with all the details.  We do not think waiting for a non-special needs referral is what is best and thankfully we had a wonderful conversation with GW about our options.  We were contacted by Diedra, who showed so much concern and compassion that I finally felt like someone from our agency was going to help us.  She made it clear that CCCWA knows we want Ethan and that we have never waivered in our love and commitment to him.  It is so unfortunate that this conversation didn't happen a week ago.  (wow, it's hard to believe it's been a week since we came home- what a nightmare of a week)  I think the pressure of outsiders combined with me flipping out on the phone has caused GW to take a look at what exactly they are doing to help and how they are conveying that to us.  I can only think of one other time in my life that I have even come close to being that upset and angry and frustrated.  I don't like that feeling.  My mama bear instinct was really showing in my last phone call with Kim.  Hopefully Diedra has learned that that is not the kind of person I am, but that I have been pushed to my limit emotionally. 

We want to reach out to the BTDT crowd of adoptive families and ask for fundraising help.  We feel we have done it all at this point and do not feel like we can ask our community for much more.  Does anyone have unique fundraising ideas that we could use?  Or maybe someone has a shoebox of cash that they want to give us?  HA!  We tell potential adoptive families all the time to not let the money stop you from adopting and that you just have to be faithful and diligent in cutting back your budget and choose successful fundraisers.  It is so much easier to be reassuring to other people than to ourselves!  We would appreciate greatly any help we can get in this area!  We do have a diamond tennis bracelet that we are thinking about auctioning off, but have never done that.  Anyone with a suggestion on how to do this?  I've always been intrigued by the puzzle piece fundraiser, but not sure exactly how that works.  Please email Tim with suggestions or advice ttucker@lebanon.k12.mo.us

I know I said I wasn't going to blog, but I just can't help it.  Tim has proofed this post and given permission for me to post it (hahahaha).  Thanks for keeping up with our story.  We look forward to sharing the happily ever after part...

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