Sunday, May 27, 2012

Too Much Mt. Dew

Well, we had a great evening at my in-laws house.  The girls got to swim for several hours and Tim and I got to sit and visit.  It's nice that the girls are old enough to swim without us having to get in.  However, I would have given just about anything to have Ethan home to enjoy this holiday weekend with us.  I would have been glad to have had him with us, even if it meant getting in water that was still pretty cold!  Anyway, I drank a Mt. Dew on the way home, so here I am wide awake while the rest of my family is snoozing away!  I have been thinking about fundraising A LOT the last few days.  It's very uncomfortable for me to talk about how much money we need to complete this adoption.  Part of me wants to just put it on credit cards and be in debt forever, but #1 that's not the right thing to do and #2 one thing we learned at The Summitt 8 conference was that God allows adoptions to be expensive because families are not meant to do it alone.  Who really has $30,000 sitting around?  Very few people I know!  But if every church in America would support just one family's adoption, there would be no more orphans!  But, people cannot help if we don't ask for it, so Tim and I are trying to find the best way to fundraise.  We really thought we would get the Show Hope grant and I feel like a fool for putting "all of our eggs in one basket."  I guess it is pride that prevents us from humbling ourselves sometimes and the fact that I know that there are a lot of people who judge adoptive families.  Our Winter DTC facebook group has had several comments lately about how unsupportive family members can be and how hard it is to get financial support from some of the people that are supposed to love you the most!  It's very interesting to me.  I wish I could remember a time in my life before I was in the "adoption" world so I could remember what I might have felt if someone asked me to support their adoption.  Adoption has been such an important part of our life for so long, I honestly can't remember!  I do think back to when I was closed-minded about us adopting, thinking I wanted to get pregnant so bad and that adoption was a last resort.  Thank you, God, for changing my heart and giving me the precious gift of Reagan, Isabella, and Becca.  They are proof that my plans stink and God's plans are perfect!  Anyway, not everyone gets it.  In coaching basketball and even watching Becca's Jr. High teams, Tim and I often comment on how you can't teach passion. You can tell when a player really has that competitive streak that makes them hustle more and give more of themselves because they really want to win.  I think you can't teach a person to care about orphans, but I do believe God can change people's hearts.  Most people need a tangible example, which reminds me of a story from The Summitt 8...

Picture this scenerio...  There's a family, let's call them the Smiths.  They have a 2 year old little girl.  One morning when the Smiths wake up, they go to check on their little girl, let's call her Abby.  Abby is not in her little toddler bed where she should be.  Before they panic, mommy and daddy Smith check all the rooms in the house.  They wake up big brother and big sister and ask if they have seen Abby.  After about 10 minutes, the Smith family realizes something is definitely wrong.  They call 9-1-1 to report Abby missing and begin to frantically call neighbors, family, and friends.  People begin posting on facebook, sending out mass texts, notifying anyone they can think of.  All the Smiths want is for their sweet little girl to be back in their arms.  12 hours pass and people begin to realize that this might not turn out so well for the Smith family.  Amber alerts go out, flyers are put up, the whole community begins to rally around this family.  They all have one goal, to find Abby safe and sound and reunite her with her family.  There are those who write little Abby off as dead, there are people who judge the family and say they are guilty of covering up some horrible crime.  There are others on the opposite end of the spectrum, the faithful ones who pray and know that God can protect this little girl, the ones who love this family so much they know they are innocent, the ones who will do whatever they can to help.  People begin thinking of ways to help by using their own talents and resources.  People take off work to search the entire town, t-shirts are made with Abby's picture on them, meals are cooked for the search parties, media is used to the max to get the word out.  So, the point of this story is this...

There are 143 million orphans in the world who are lost.  They are in desperate need of a mommy and daddy to find them.  It takes a village (so to speak) to put their resources together to unite children with families.  Why are more people outside the adoption community (because these people already get it) not absolutely appalled at the number 143 MILLION.  That's more kids than I can comprehend.  And how do we solve the orphan crisis?  By supporting people who are willing to step out on faith and provide a home for an orphan.  I used to be bothered by that word.  ORPHAN.  It just seems so sad.  I used to picture the kids in the move Annie when they sing that song "It's a Hard Knock Life For Us".  Now I picture Reagan Lynsi Tucker.  And Isabella Agnese Tucker.  And Becca Daniela Tucker. 

And Ethan Thomas Tucker. 

Orphans are just normal kids who have every right to a mommy and daddy and a house and a bed and enough food to eat.  They deserve medical care and birthday parties and happy memories.  Just like the pretend "Abby", they deserve to be at home with a family.  Most of all they deserve to know the love of Jesus Christ.  After all isn't adoption the most perfect example of God's love for us.  We are messed up and full of sin, but our heavenly father accepts us and loves us and calls us His sons and daughters.  He adopts us even though we are not perfect.  He adopts us because he loves us so much that He gave His one and only son for us.  Yes, for me!  And you!  And all those children who are orphans right now.  His plan was not to have 143 million orphans for us to ignore.  There are enough families and enough resources to end the orphan crisis, but people are going to have to step up and follow God' example.  James 1:27 is not a suggestion.  It is a command.  Take care of widows and orphans.  Oh, by the way, orphanage IS NOT a word that is found in the Bible.  It is not God's plan.  We should be emptying orphanages, not building them.  Instead of worrying about what a family is thinking when they adopt another child, think about how you can be a support system.  Adoption is not for everyone, but we all have a James 1:27 gift.  Maybe you have extra money to donate towards someone's adoption.  Maybe you could offer to help in another way.  There are so many ways every person can help.  It really is selfish not to.  Think about the pretend scenerio of the Smith family, you know you would be a person who would get caught up in the situation and help in any way you could.  Children should not be out in this big world alone.  Maybe adoption doesn't make sense to everyone, but a lost child does.  So try to think about each orphan as a child who needs help from you to be united with a forever family. 

Okay, all that to say... Tim and I need help to bring Ethan home.  We want to try to raise $8,000 in the next 10 weeks.  We have a lot of ideas and not much time and we are praying hard about which fundraising option to pursue.  We are swallowing our pride and insecurities and giving it to God.  If He puts it on your heart, please listen.  I think that criticism is born out of conviction because sometimes we try to fight what God wants us to do because it isn't what the world tells us we should do.  We can all make excuses.  Let me just say that if I kept making excuses not to adopt when God called us to, I would be a mommy of one lonely little girl who would not have the joy of being a sister.  There are so many people that I never would have met and so many others who may not have adopted.  God has used our family in a great way and I am honored that He chose me to be an adoptive mommy!  Ethan is my son because God chose him for us.  He made it so obvious to Tim and to each of the girls that we were meant to have this little boy in our family.  I can't wait to bring him home to all of his big sisters and to see what God has in store for his life.  Will it be easy?  NO!  Will we have to sacrifice material stuff?  YES!  Will it be worth it?  YES!  Will YOU be a part of it?  I hope so.

God Bless and good-night!  (wow,  no more mt. dew for me!!!!!)


  1. How can those who cannot help financially help you?

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